it didn’t work out. 5 things this does not mean.
There are times when things just don’t work out. You prayed and you fasted, you sought advice, and you thought for sure that God was calling you to that place, to that Church, to work for that leader, and do that thing. Welcome new resident!
But it went bust.
It’s over. This was not what you thought it was going to be. It wasn’t fun. It was toxic. It was too much or it was not enough.
It’s especially rough if this is your first real job after college, it’s rough if it’s your first “real ministry” - you had been looking forward to this for years.
What now?
It’s time to move on. We’ve talked before about getting fired or when it doesn’t work for the boss, but what if it’s YOU that didn’t work? You are quitting before getting fired, moving on, and wondering how this happened to you!?
In a decade or three this may make sense, but for now, we can assure you a few things that this does NOT mean:
All Churches Are Bad. You’ve had a singular experience and it’s easy to over reach on the learning. “I had a bad church employment experience therefore churches are bad places to work.” You’ll find that’s not necessarily true.
Church Leaders or Churches Like That Are All ________. Fill in the blank with toxic, bad, workaholics, too corporate, or just bad places to work. This is similar to saying that all people like “that” are a “certain way.” It’s too broad it’s too general, although in the moment it definitely feels that way.
Ministry isn’t for you. You’re probably the kind of person who is going to choose something difficult (like serving others). Your life, your education, those around you, and the little messages along way, all have pointed to this moment and we have seen plenty of others recover. You will too.
That person (boss or co-worker) is wrong or evil. At the highest levels of business, professional athletics, govt, education, and healthcare, certain mixes of people don’t work out. We often see headlines often how a high-powered CEO went to one company and it was a disaster. Four months later they went somewhere else and have had years of success. Some baseball managers completely lose it with one team, quit, and then go win the World Series somewhere else. So if this happens at that level surely the same is true for us in the local church.
You should just cram all this down and ignore it. No! Find a good counselor, find some truth-tellers who’ll risk their friendship. Go find someone 7 years older than you who is in a fruitful ministry today who quit or got fired in their first ministry a few years back. This will help you see what could be possible for you someday.
Above all, find people who have perspective. Everyone has a story of how they got to where they are, but some people are in the unique position of having been involved in many people’s stories. They have seen patterns hundreds or thousands of times. They can predict, guide, and help you move forward.
So…it didn’t work out. You quit. You got fired. It happens. In fact…it’s been going on for years in the church. It’s happening right now in education, small business, big corporations, government, and non-profit work. Lots of people quit early or get fired in their first job.
God is still God. The harvest is still plentiful. If you take positive steps forward with a good group of folks around you you will be ok. This is just one more step in you becoming you.