soft skills

by Dave Miller Lp Co-Founder

A few years ago, Seth Godin pointed out that soft skills aren’t just “nice to have” anymore—they’re essential. Everyone is talented. Many are smart. But if you Google “soft skills,” you’ll find endless books, podcasts, and training on the topic.

The real challenge? Soft skills aren’t taught—they’re coached in. You can hand someone a book, but that won’t automatically make them a better communicator, problem-solver, or team player. At the end of the day, it’s the supervisor or coach who has to step up and do the hard work of developing these skills.

A leadership resident’s success depends heavily on their supervisor’s ability to coach. Soft skills don’t develop in a vacuum. They are talked into existence through intentional feedback loops and developmental conversations.

Writing about soft skills? That’s the easy part. (I’ve proven that!)

But giving honest, grace-filled feedback at the right time, in the right tone? That’s the real challenge. It requires repetition. It requires patience. And most importantly, it requires the coach having a coach. Because let’s be real: all coaches need coaches.

How do you start a conversation about self-awareness?

How do you coach flexibility when you don’t see it in a young team member?

How do you circle back with both truth and love and say, “Hey, I know we’ve talked about this before, but we need to revisit how you showed up with your co-workers last week”?

These conversations aren’t easy. They take time. They take courage. And they take leaders who are willing to invest in the next generation.

Before Leadership Pathway even launched, we identified twenty soft skills that kept coming up in our conversations with church leaders. What’s missing in new hires? What’s keeping young leaders from thriving?

With every passing year, the hiring gap seems to be widening. Experienced managers—who are sometimes only 34 years old—are throwing up their hands, frustrated by the lack of soft skills in the next wave of leaders.

Eight years ago, we were talking about Millennials and Gen Z. Now, Gen Z is turning 30 next year, and we’re already looking at Gen Alpha.

This is why we do what we do. We want to help leaders start healthy and stay in ministry for the long haul. Developing soft skills isn’t a quick fix—it’s the slow, steady work of coaching, feedback, and real-life experience.

We’re in the trenches figuring this out every day. What do you see that we’re missing?

Let’s talk. Shoot me an email—I’d love to hear your perspective.

Self Care

Teachable

Failing Forward

Time Management

Managing Details

Communication

Initiative

Self-Awareness

Flexible

Work Ethic

Personable

Decision-Making

Influence

Continual Growth

Conflict Management

Leading a Meeting

Leading a Team

Delegation

Developing Others

Networking